The lobby at Delaney's dance class is full of three different kinds of moms: there are the ones that sit together on one side of the room, talk loudly and avoid eye contact with anyone not in their yoga pant, designer purse-clad group. There are the moms that drop their kids off and make to the nearest exit as fast as they can. Then, there's the lepers. The moms that scrounge for whatever chair is leftover, or they sit on the floor at the back of the studio in their jeans and dole out goldfish crackers from non-designer diaper bags. The moms that are always late with the payment. The moms that never seem to "fit in". You know, like me. Maybe it's because I'm always drunk. Hmm.
But anyway, today, I made a friend with a fellow leper.
When you stay at home with your children full time, meeting a new person with whom you might actually have something in common with is an event. A celebration. It's like a freakin' date. Do you ask for her phone number? Or does that make you sound too desperate? Will she think you're a stalker if you find her on Facebook and friend her? Should you follow her home, get her address and send her flowers? I just don't know...This friendship thing is hard.
Not that I'm completely anti-social. I do have friends. Just because no one can see them doesn't mean they aren't real. But believe it or not, I have real ones, too. I have several acquaintances and a few very close friends with whom I cannot imagine not having in my life. Friends who forgive me, no matter how bad of a friend I am. And I love them to pieces...but I've discovered that as an adult, for me anyway, making a true friend is really, really tricky. I don't know how to do it.
But today, I managed to control myself and after class, I resisted following my fellow leper home. Only because I know a restraining order would make it difficult to take Delaney to dance class. Maybe next week I'll just bring her a small gift...like a life-sized portrait of her, done in macaroni noodles. I'm sure I could get Delaney to help.