Saturday, September 25, 2010

Liberation!

My saintly neighbor watched my two youngest so I could go to the grocery store. Alone. That hasn't happened in years. On the way there, I cranked the music up loud without the shrieks and whines that usually accompany that. I sang. Loudly. To Nine Inch Nails. I exceeded the speed limit by 4 miles an hour, I swore at the man who turned in front of me.

"What!? You &*#(@ moron! Did that year not come with a %&(#@%$& turn signal?" without having to worry that the little sponges in the backseat would repeat it back at some inopportune time. Preschool conferences are stressful enough. And all this excitement, all this liberation before I even entered the store.

I selected the first cart I came to. There was no crying and begging and searching for the one cart in the store that looks like a car. There were no arguments about who was going to ride up front, or who got to sit in the basket, or was going to hold the list. I got to hold my own list. I had time to look at my coupons and actually compare items and prices. I was able to examine the strawberries and the apples. I picked the best avocados. No one was crying. I wasn't constantly pulling on little arms, trying to get them out of the way of the other shoppers. I didn't once have to smile at some stranger in an apologetic way. I didn't even have to talk. For an entire hour, I didn't once say anything. It was...nice. Because I don't really like to talk but that's all I do, all day long.

"No! You can not spray the dog with the hose!"
"Why, may I ask, are there Benderoos hooked to the ceiling fan?"
"What is in the TOILET??"

So, it was refreshing. Not having to speak. To leisurely stroll the aisles of the grocery store, checking items off my list with satisfaction. If they offered champagne at the door, it would have been perfect. They really should do that, while they wipe your cart down with their velvet towels and bow graciously.

I was stalked through the produce aisle by an over-enthusiastic older man and I realized with regret, that my wedding ring was at home. Fortunately, I avoided additional contact and was able to lose him in the frozen foods. Elderly gentlemen can't quite get it up to speed sometimes...you know, their cart?

But all good things must come to an end. Who would have thought I'd ever say that about Wal-Mart? Eeegads. But I hurried home to get the kids with plenty of time to get Nick from the bus. And dare I say? It was nice to see their smiling little faces.

21 comments:

Homemaker Man said...

Yes! Smelling the flowers, squeezing the tomatoes, finding the milk with the furthest sell by date. The joys. The joys.

Angela said...

I've taken to making my husband come with me grocery shopping, and essentially what happens is I push the cart through the first couple produce aisles, and then all of a sudden I've vanished and I'm always one row ahead of my husband who is stuck with the cart and the screaming child. :) I may take over every 5th aisle and then leave again. It's like.. amazing. I'm not sure how this will work once #2 comes in November. But I bet grocery shopping will suck the big one.

Brian Miller said...

smiles. we all need those times...glad you got a little freedom...NIN...nice....

Bekah said...

It's amazing how mundane errands can become a mini vacation when we get to go alone!

AmyLK said...

I love when I get to go to the store by myself! Its almost worth paying the babysitter somedays. Glad you got to enjoy it!

chele said...

Thanks goodness for saintly neighbors!

singedwingangel said...

Wait I get to do that and still feel rushed because sure as the world something will go wrong with the kids at the house.. Ummyeah I am that mom

Shilo said...

I was happy to do it!!! If you need any more breaks just let me know. God knows I owe you big time! :)

Tractor Mom said...

Don't loose that neighbor!! Make sure you fix them dinner or something so that maybe they'll watch the kids again! We need those times by ourselves.

Come by when you make sure you loose the crazy old man...

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

Short term peace is.....delicious! :)

Burkulater said...

Sounds like a day in my life! Isn't it crazy what a couple hours away will do for you?!

Susan Fobes said...

Alone time can be glorious, even it it's at a Walmart...

Andrea (ace1028) said...

Oh, geez, the one time recently my husband dropped me off at the grocery store and actually took my daughter for a ride I wanted to cry with joy. It truly is an amazing and incredible experience, isn't it? :)

Sharlene T. said...

Unless you're a single mother, why would you ever take the children shopping with you? If he helped make the little darlings, he can watch them while you're out getting the food... it only makes sense, since he's not out killing the bears, anymore, while you watch the fire at the cave... I never took my children grocery shopping with me... Simply assumed watching them was his job... Am I going to have to write a book about this?... lol... glad you enjoyed your respite...

Bethany @ Organic Enchilada said...

Sounds heavenly. I take five little boys to the grocery store with me every other Friday. It's not my most favorite thing in the world. I hope you aren't ruined for future trips!

Jennifer Haas said...

I know how you feel. I love it when I get to go to the store alone. It's like a mini vacation, isn't it? Is that sad, that we dream about moments like this?

You kids sound so funny. You should link up some of their quotes on my blog for Things Kids Say on Thursdays.

The Blonde Duck said...

Wal-Mart is where I go if I start wanting children. Best birth control down here ever.

Erin said...

You know you're a mom when....

going to the grocery store alone feels wonderful & freeing like this.

;-)

Kristy said...

Oh, you poor thing! I get the luxury of going alone to the grocery store a couple times a month. It really is a lot more work to have kid(s) with you!!!

Unknown Mami said...

That's sounds like a wonderful break from routine. Those few moments can be so re-energizing.

Joy said...

That sounds like heaven!!!! I totally agree with the champagne and the wiping of the carts. I also love Nine Inch Nails :)

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