I hate talking on the phone. Hate it. Despise it. If it rings, I most likely will not answer it. You can leave a message, but I probably won't listen to it. My husband will see the light flashing on the machine and listen.
"You have 17 new messages," the stupid thing will announce.
"Do you ever check this?" my husband asks.
He sighs and checks the messages. I'm pretty sure he didn't realize how neurotic I was when he married me.
I looked it up and found out that it's called telephobia. It's actual real thing. I'm not afraid of the phone, I'm well aware that it won't strangle me while I sleep (at least now, since it's cordless), but that doesn't make me like it anymore. It's always been like that...even in high school. I was never one of those teen girls that would spend hours on the phone. (Except to my boyfriend. But that was different. We couldn't bear to be away from each other for more than a few hours, so we had to talk often, to ease the pain.) I read the common reasons people are telephobic, but I don't know if they necessarily fit. I'm perfectly capable of being ridiculed and misunderstood while not on the phone. If anything, I think I come across less of a freak on the phone than I do in person. I just hate it.
I would much prefer to email, or write a letter, or use smoke signals. Just because I don't call you back doesn't mean I don't love you.