Friday, April 16, 2010

I almost made it...

There is an unwritten law somewhere that states that something will go wrong every time I go to Walmart. Every time. But I keep going back. Why? WHY? I don't know. I suppose it's the same reason I had three kids and opted to stay home with them. I'm a glutton for punishment. I like pain. I'm making up for wrongs done in past lives. I'm completely insane.

I don't have any other explanation for it.

Last time, both Delaney and Nick were in school and it was just Sam and I. I figured, "Hey! This will be easy! Just the baby and me!" Yeah. Well. He screamed from the moment I walked in the door to the moment we walked out. I forgot half the items on my list because I was in such a hurry to get out of there. Then, before that, there was this time. And I'm sure there were times before that and before that, but my mind's defensive mechanisms have blocked them from memory.

Which brings us to today. It was going so smoothly. Sam was in the cart, not screaming, Delaney was in the basket, not crying or whining and Nick was walking along side the cart, not acting like a monkey. It was amazing. I was lingering over items, comparing prices, checking my coupons. All in all, a very successful shopping trip. Things started to fall apart at the check out, but still, nothing a candy bribe can't solve. I even remembered my canvas bags. Then we're walking through the parking lot, a kid on each side of the cart and one in the basket, contentedly eating their candy. The bags are arranged just so in the cart; heavy things on the bottom, soft, crushable things on the top.

At the car, I park the cart halfway in the grass to prevent it rolling away while I unload. But first, I get the kids in the car. As I'm pulling Sam out of the cart, his leg gets stuck and we struggle a bit. Not much, but just enough to jostle the cart towards the grassy side.

And then over.

Onto its side.

ONTO ITS SIDE.

All my carefully arranged bags are now spread out all over the ground, the cart laying on it's side. The hamburger buns were securely wedged beneath the orange juice. The milk did a fine job of bruising the apples. I hate loading my groceries onto the conveyor belt in the store. But I hate picking my groceries up off the ground in the parking lot even more. Now, I wish I would have taken a picture. It really was a sight to behold.

A nice couple witnessed my ordeal and came to my rescue. But come on! Really? I was almost free. I almost made it. I was so close...

34 comments:

Susan Fobes said...

I avoid Walmart like the plague! (Sorry about your trip-you must have some sort of Walmart curse. I'm dealing with a curse of a different nature...)

browneyes_24b said...

You were so close! Great post! I find myself cringing when I load my groceries on the conveyor belt. The fate of my food is at the mercy of the young bag-person who doesn't realize they've placed the bread between cartons of milk. Or that the peaches have been placed amongst cans. I say nothing so as not to be "that" lady, but it drives me crazy to watch them do it. I am rooting for you on your next trip to Wally World! :)

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

At least you made it out of the store without any humongous haps. Now, if you can only have an uneventful trip back to the car! :)

Miss Fit said...

Walmart=Evil or is it devil? Shop at night. Maybe that will throw a wrench in the plans.

Brian Miller said...

somedays we have those almost moments...i think they just help us appreciate those that are not. smiles.

GlowinGirl said...

Oh, I'm laughing. I'm sorry. :)

My baby girl used to cry every time we entered that store. It was like someone flipped her switch.

But it's so cheap . . .

Tropical Mum said...

Online grocery shopping is the answer! I have been doing with out this must-have service since I moved from Sydney in 2006 and this year FINALLY two of our major grocery stores have figured out that there is a bit of money to be had from harried mothers who cannot stand to shop with their kids.

Sorry about the grocery shopping mishap--hope it goes well next time.

Shelly

Chantel said...

I think Wal-Mart is where good days go to die. I can be having the BEST day, but as soon as I walk in the door of that store, it all goes to hell.

Sarah said...

We have a store here called Ultra Foods where you have to bag your own groceries---I break out in a sweat every time I go because I feel like I am working against a stop watch with a gun to my head to get things packed up timely. Granted, the store is a little cheaper, but I keep asking myself if saving $.25 is worth the stress....

MrsJenB said...

Aww...my heart goes out to you on this one. I've had many disastrous trips, especially to Walmart. Granted,my cart usually stayed upright...

I'm glad there was someone there to help you!

MrsJenB said...

Aww...my heart goes out to you on this one. I've had many disastrous trips, especially to Walmart. Granted,my cart usually stayed upright...

I'm glad there was someone there to help you!

Juliana said...

Oh no!!! Mmm...maybe Target next time?

Aging Mommy said...

I don't shop at Walmart as we don't have one near us so for me Target is where it all goes wrong. Nothing quite like wheeling a screaming, tear stained toddler through the store with everyone looking at you. Not to mention the car park meltdown during which your toddler lies prone on the tarmac in the path of all oncoming vehicles.

I am English and over there online grocery shopping has been in existence for a very long time. I hope it gets introduced here (so far not where we live) as I shall definitely switch to shopping that way!

Great post - sorry though about your shopping!

Raelene said...

Ouch!!!!! I feel for you, how annoying! I would have thrown myself down and had a fit right there :(

The Empress said...

I know, but, like grocery shopping, it has to be done.

You just take one for the team...
I feel your pain.

Sharlene T. said...

Just asking...are you all single mothers? I never took my children shopping with me -- it was hubby's job to babysit the little darlings he helped create while I did household procurement runs. That was set in stone the minute I came home from the hospital with the first heir...

If you aren't single mothers, start figuring out a way to bring this to the table...

When my husband passed, I became a single mother of teenagers. If you want to have any money left after grocery shopping, the same rule applies. So, I discovered nighttime shopping, when they were at school functions. OMG! What a delightful difference! If you can, try it. It's really wonderful.

And, don't be afraid to tell them how you want your groceries separated. Forget about any looks you get. You're paying for their products and you have the right to get them home as close to their sold state as possible. You're not being mean and I wouldn't be the least bothered if I were behind you in line...

Bossy Betty said...

Somewhere somebody was looking at a monitor of this scene that was being captured by a security camera. I am sure you made their day....

I think the universe is trying to tell you something....

Amo said...

Oh, I am so sorry! That is terrible! Wal-mart trips are always harrowing with kids. I took my son in there with me once and he screamed from the moment we walked in until we left. He was about 15 months at the time. He threw a tantrum at the front of the store and started hitting me in the face. Everybody was staring at us. I grabbed what I could carry and left!

Marla said...

Yep. Wal Mart is hell.

Kinderscares said...

You know, I have this trouble with ANY place that sells groceries, it's not limited to Walmart. Catastrophe is guaranteed any time I have to purchase food with children in tow.

My mother and I went grocery shopping together with the kids last week. We were so exhausted and distracted by the second stop (perhaps this is the fatal mistake...more than one store) that she locked the keys in the ignition with the car running and NEITHER ONE OF US NOTICED until we came out of the store 45 minutes later. *facepalm*

Sorry to hear you had another crappy shopping experience!

3LittleMonkeys said...

Ugh, Walmart. I think it puts a curse on every mom who walks through the doors!!

Angela said...

i HATE walmart. i haven't been in months. i only go when it's completely and absolutely necessary, and even then.. i try to send my husband alone.

Homemaker Man said...

You should sue! Sue their arses off! Walmart, I mean. Not the kids. You can't get crap from a civil suit against your kids. I know.

Melissa said...

Maybe you should try Target next time! :)

Erin said...

you were so close. i am SO sorry. it's really great that people came to help you, though?

the closest i've come to this is that my cart started to roll away...and i had to chase it. and once it rolled backwards and bonked into my car (fortunately not someone else's!). so hard when you're getting kids in, car seats, unloading groceries, etc....ugh!

Amanda T said...

Hey There!
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While your there please feel free to check out one of my newest giveaways for a SodaStream Machine. Or you can even read about things I like under my look at life tab.

Anyways,
Take Care; I'll be back to check up periodically.

-Amanda T
http://mylifewithratsandmore.blogspot.com

and sorry for not posting on the other, But the poop in the park really cracked me up lolol :)!

Krista said...

When my son was five he tipped our cart over twice with my three year old in it. I wanted to kill him. He was such a mean little mongrel, you'd never know he grew up to be a nice kid. Now, my youngest is nine and she may as well be a toddler because she whines and complains the entire time. Shopping freedom is a good thing!

CaneWife said...

Walmart is my nemesis.

That sounds like just an awful, awful shopping trip.

I would skip the big W altogether going forward.

Just Breathe said...

:(
Very nice of that couple to help you. Maybe you should try you luck at Target :)

Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip said...

Oh I am so sorry but I can't help but laugh at your distress. Only becuase I also shop at WalMart and am quite sure that it is the den of Satan himself. Well...at least you got out of there alive, right?

JENIE=) said...

wish you'll visit =(

panamamama said...

God, I hate Walmart! It has the same effect on my family- something bad always happens when we go. The last visit my 5 yr old proceeded to projectile vomit all over everything when we were NEXT IN LINE. Argh.

SoMo Mom said...

OMG! I'm totally cracking up right now... not AT you, WITH you, of course. Just because I have been there... I AM there, right now. The craziness of just something as simple as stopping to get a couple groceries. It's great that we can "laugh" at ourselves though. Check out my latest bribe while trying to shop at Target ... has a little to do with Silly Bandz & a little to do with Super Nanny! Thanks for the laugh today!
http://southernmomentum.com/2010/05/super-mom-silly-bandz-super-nanny/

Jingle said...

try new or fresh ones if possible,
until we exhaust all options, we always have complaints or hope...
Happy Thursday!

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