Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Apology to my family

Several of my blog posts have gotten me in trouble with some people who are important to me and I want to apologize. I am so sincerely sorry for any feelings that have been hurt.

I love my in-laws. I really, truly do. Of course, we are a family and we are going to have problems, but I am lucky that they are who they are. I'm very fortunate. I love my sister in law, Darrin's step sister. She is an incredible woman and I am crushed thinking that I may have hurt her feelings with my careless words. For the sake of (not so funny) humor, I said some unnecessary things and I've deleted all the posts that caused offense. Again, I am sorry.

I do want to clarify that I consider myself a writer. Also known as a liar. I make up things, I exaggerate things. This blog is made up of as much exaggeration as it is real life and the posts in question are no exception. But either way, they are gone and I will be careful of what I write in the future.

I insult my own family as well, if it makes things better. And you're supposed to complain about your in laws. It's just what you do! :) (But it won't happen again...)

So, so sorry. Love you guys.

38 comments:

dawn said...

Hey- that's family is for. To make fun of. Or maybe that's not what they're for at all.
I think it's so you have someone to forgive you when you do/say stupid things.
Because that's what family does. They love you and forgive you...

I hope since I think my family is reading my blog too...Oh Crap!

Sunday said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Tiffany said...

it is hard--family, blogging/writing, humor. combining them proves to be difficult at times. know this--you are a great writer/liar.

Matty said...

This is why no one other than my wife even knows about my blog. I like it that way.

Raelene said...

It's hard to be completely honest when you have family members reading your blog. Sometimes I want so badly to bitch about my in laws and other people in my life that sometimes irritate me, but like you they read my blog so I can't. Maybe I need to start a new one where I can bitch alllllll day long and no one would be any wiser.

Willoughby said...

You are such a sweet person, I'm sure your words were not meant to be insulting. I hope it was all a misunderstanding and that there are no more hurt feelings.

Take care!!

Existential Waitress said...

I really relate to this. I am constantly negotiating what I can write about, who might read it, who might be potentially hurt and/or affected by what I choose to say. But you're right, when you're a writer, you do exaggerate and make things up, and sometimes someone you love becomes the butt of a joke and they don't like it so much. That's the story of my life...I hope your family understands and is able to brush it off.

Deb said...

so what you're saying is your poetic license has been revoked? :)

you're sweet to apologize to your family members that obviously care about you.

writing what you know, with an audience that likes to be entertained is a tough road to navigate.

Andrea (ace1028) said...

It is kind of you to apologize, however you need to be yourself, as well. Be who you are as that's who we love and why we come by. No need to apologize, IMO. I get why you did, but moving forward, just be true to you! (And yeah, we [I sometimes think I am one!] writers sometimes go overboard, but hey, that's what writing is all about!)

Angela said...

I never apologize.

I mean, exactly -- it's flared up (although mine is usually verbatim of how it happened since my life is so insanely dramatic) for the story. You shouldn't have to apologize for telling the truth OR for telling a story through your eyes. No matter who it's to. This is your little realm to say what you please.

I had this tiff with MY inlaws last year. I told them if they wanted me to stop writing things that made them look bad, they needed to stop making themselves look bad!

Such a fine line we walk.

Joshua said...

Hmm...not sure what to say. I'm sorry you had to apologize to family and delete stuff because of it. The Wife and my parents read mine, but I've warned them that if something annoys them, they're more than welcome to stop reading because I won't change it. That's just me. But I can appreciate your circumstance. I'm sorry.

Ed Adams said...

Ah, yes.

The dreaded retraction.

I gave up on pleasing people a long time ago.

Nobody forces them to read it.

3LittleMonkeys said...

Yes, it's a fine line when I write about family. I try to be nice but sometimes I just gotta let it out! But I think you did the right thing in removing the posts that offended family members.
Kepp writing!! Love your blog!

Tracie said...

You could always get an anon. blog. My family would freak the eff out if they knew I had a blog.

BigSis said...

That is exactly why I'm so emphatic about keeping my blog anonymous. My sister reads, but she has a blog too, so we keep both a secret from the rest of the fam.

Shell said...

That would be why my family and even friends do not know about my blog.

Brian Miller said...

i am sure the apology was accepted...

leigh said...

I'm insulted that they got insulted.

I've got your back!

--Tumbleweed said...

I've read most of your entries and never once thought, "damn, I'm glad I'm not her ________." Honestly, I've said worse to my family in person!

Just invent alter-egos and pseudonyms for your family. Then write whatever you want: "What? No, dear in-law. Of course you aren't (fake name here). Why would you think that? feeling guilty? Really, I would never say that about you ... ;P"

Neva said...

Feeling you...

Alice in Wonderland said...

I think we all slip up and put our foot in it at times!
With me, I suffer from Foot-in-Mouth disease at times!
Don't worry about it, it's something that we all do!

Sarah said...

You are totally not a liar. I elaborate on everything. I tell the husband, "sorry! You just have to deal with it!" Sorry it got you into trouble, though. That's hard!

freckletree. said...

this so sucks.

this is your blog and your space and you are censored.

but that it so the reality of it all and there's not a damn thing you can do about it.

except, ahem, create a blog in which the sole purpose is to bitch about people that read this blog.

i always struggle with discussing anti-religion on my blog with an uber-religious family reading. or anal sex with a prude mother. no, not WITH the mother, the mother is reading. nevermind.

Graceful said...

I think it's brave and honorable of you that you apologized. It's not worth hurting your loved ones. I issued a retraction on my blog one day, too -- I felt like I'd been a little too harsh on my pastor, of all people. He took it graciously, but I still felt guilty (although I didn't remove the offending post!).

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

I feel sorry for you. Two times I have written posts that I thought were harmless but ended up causing bad feeling with friends or family. It really knocked me down for awhile. I wasnt even sure I wanted to keep blogging. But I kept doing it and that feeling gets better. I promise. Hang in there!

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

I feel sorry for you. Two times I have written posts that I thought were harmless but ended up causing bad feeling with friends or family. It really knocked me down for awhile. I wasnt even sure I wanted to keep blogging. But I kept doing it and that feeling gets better. I promise. Hang in there!

Tattoos and Teething Rings said...

I think it was kind but unnecessary for you to apologize. Your blog is YOURS. None of my family reads my blog; some of them know I have one but no one is interested ;)

People should lighten up a bit, of course you're going to share the funny/embarrassing stories and rant, that's way more entertaining and gratifying than constantly carying on about how much you love everyone and everything is perfect- gag me. Most people understand that you still love your family. I hope you get your blog back to the way you want it.

Amanda said...

Yikes!

Sorry you must censor yourself but they're your family and you must deal with them. Not us.

You did the right thing.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

You are gracious in your apologies and you know what? I'm sure they do understand!

Writing and blogging are different, yet the same. With blogging it's easy to spew it all out and then not realize that there will be some readers that may question why you have said what you've said. With writing, whether in book form or short story or non-fiction or journal, you are giving your exact view without having to "take back" anything. You stand behind your words because there are no regrets for those words.

I suspect that I have family members reading my blog but that they never comment. Because of this, I am subject to censoring more than I should.

It takes a huge step to move forward and not let it get you down.

The Waylaid Wordsmith said...

You're a great writer and your posts are always highly entertaining. It sucks that this happened (it would undoubtedly happen to me too, which is why I refuse to tell anyone about my blog).

It's so hard to worry about how every little thing you say could upset someone. The only real-life person reading my blog is my husband, and he thankfully has an awesome sense of humour about me occasionally mocking him.

I hate to think of you needing to censor yourself, but I understand wanting to avoid potential drama and hurt feelings. Ugh. What a crappy deal.

Just Breathe said...

I have an award for you so stop on over to get it.

purejoy said...

visiting from just breathe.

gah. i think i'd puke if my family actually read my blog!

and i get the writing/exaggerating thing. it's so normal.

hope your family recovers. (at least they have almost a year to fugeddaboudit before christmas!)

and i hope your rib is feeling better. i broke mine in a car wreck and that was pretty painful! heal fast!

suzicate said...

I haven't turned my family onto my blog for that fear. I like the freedom to say what's on my heart and for humor. I'm not allowed to do the inlaw stuff because hubby gave them my link. Upsets me that I have to withhold that part because I do have some funny stuff in that dept. That is the same reason I don't link my blog to FB. Hope all heals over and sorry it happended to you...I definitely feel for you!

Erin said...

I rag on my family in my posts, but mostly leave my in-laws out of it. That being said, my post yesterday was a little tongue-in-cheek, sneaky way to peck at my MIL.

I am sorry this happened. I consider myself a writer, too, and I wish more people undertood what that means....

Suz said...

I am sorry you were put in the position to have to delete your posts.

I hope it does not take the joy out of blogging for you. Part of the appeal is to be able to speak your mind and heart to others who care.

Be strong, it will be fine.

Tina said...

Darn it.. and how great of you to own what you can and apologize for the rest. I am sure you didn't mean to purposefully hurt anyone... and you can't always control their variables when they read what you write either. I hope not to offend anyone... I am pretty authentic and just write what is on my mind. Check out my About Us page, http://catchingmysecondwind.blogspot.com/search/label/About%20Us I write about my husband's family and make no apologies. :)

Holly said...

It is such a fine line when you talk about family. Hubby doesn't want me talking about him much, other than just referencing him (I am OK with that). I know my mom, MIL, and SIL read the blog and I have talked to them all...but generally try to avoid it. Hope everything can be smoothed over.

Marla said...

Some of my family no longer speaks to me over my blog. You are kinder than I am.

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