I have always believed that if you don't have enough money to pay the bills, you may as well take what you have and go shopping.
Finally, my husband has come to see the logic in this and for the first time in 7 years, my husband and I spent a night outside of our house.
We took some of our meager funds and went up to Estes Park for the weekend with the kids. We reserved a room at a hotel with a pool, borrowed my brother's annual pass to the Rocky Mountain National Park and headed up the canyon.
I may have mentioned that I get carsick. And the drive up the canyon is horrible without my Dramamine. My husband stopped at a gas station and got me some and used to the chewable kind, I dump a few out, pop them in my mouth and chew them up. And immediately start wretching and gagging. Turns out they weren't chewable. And after the performance I put on, just try to get two little kids to take them...you can't just stick the pills in a hot dog, shove it in their mouth and blow in their face like you can a dog. No. So, again with the candy bribery thing...several minutes later and lots of spitting, yelling and gagging we were on our way.
Of course, the baby, who is too little for Dramamine, throws up all over himself and the seat. Apparently motion sickness is hereditary. Fortunately, my car is full of paper towels, wipes and kleenex and I cleaned the poor baby up. (He's had a heck of a few days...) We hung around for a bit and since I grew up in Estes Park, I was able to bore my husband and children with stories of my long ago youth.
"See that movie theater? We used to tell my mom we were going to watch a movie and then sneak...um, sneak quietly into the theater so we wouldn't disturb anyone and then watch the whole movie and there was never alcohol involved. Ever."
"See that Safeway? I was with some friends and we were kicked out of there once...because, ahem, um... lookie! Birdie!"
We watched elk, found some bighorn sheep then headed to the hotel for the evening. We ate a terrible, expensive dinner at the hotel because "Kids eat Free!" (they leave out the "kids eat free because we charge the parent's twice as much!" part.)
A very large,woman in a chef hat stood near our table, manning (no pun intended...you'll get it in a minute) the buffet table.
"LOOK AT THAT MAN!" Delaney says, loudly, pointing at her. Ignore it and she will stop, I think.
"LOOK AT THAT MAN!" she says again. I sneak a sideways glance at the chef; she's glowering at our table. Nick decides to be helpful.
"That's not a MAN, Delaney! That's a lady!" "Lady" goes back into the kitchen. We leave restaurant, quickly.
Then we swim and Delaney peed in the hot tub.
We decide it's a good time to head to the room where after much whining, hitting and complaining, I end up sharing a bed with Delaney and the baby, with Nick and daddy in the other. My husband and I share a romantic goodnight kiss across the room and off to sleep we go. I can't help but recall the last time my husband and I shared a hotel room. Our one year anniversary. The sleeping arrangements were, um, closer. And a bit more active.
More of the same the next day, bad food, more boring stories from me, more elk, snow, exploring...all together blissful.
Then at around noon, my husband looks at me.
"Do you realize that the day is half over and no one has mentioned my birthday?" he asks.
Oh. My. God. Oh my God. I forgot my husband's birthday. I forgot it.
Forget the bad mommy thing. I ROCK at being a mommy. I completely SUCK at being a wife.
Or at least, now I'm going to have to...
Which brings me to this:
The lovely Jennie Mac has bestowed this completely awesome award on me. You should go see her. She has one of the best blogs around. I will be handing this award out soon, but right now I have to plan a gourmet dinner for my husband, make some Tiramasu, dust off the lingerie...I'll be making ammends for this oversight for the rest of my life.